Monthly Archives: May 2010

Picture of the Day: Emaciated 50 Cent

              

                  (Picture from Wonderwall.msn.com)

Is this guy really, once brawny, 50 Cent? It’s amazing. I was sort of riveted as I saw the rapper in MSN Messenger Today. Title reads: 50 Cent downgrades to 10 Cent.

Wonderwall.msn.com writes, he downgraded his weight from 214 to 160 pounds for his upcoming film "Things Fall Apart”.

I never watched his ”Before I Self Destruct” though I’ve this movie downloaded in my old PC. Generally, I download movies and watch them on DVD (I hardly visit local video parlors because they only sell either Cam, TS, Screener or other nuked rips). It’s already been months and I was really thinking to see the movie but ‘time’ never came. Been just bumming around. Been a real dosser……I wonder, I would have never felt ‘bothered’ to watch ‘The Lovely Bones‘ were it not from Peter Jackson.

I even shared the movie with some of my friends and they said they didn’t like the movie. I still have more than a dozen recent movies such as: Alice, The Wolfman, and classics such as: The Silence of the Lambs, Saving Private Ryan etc. left unseen. Just a few days ago, I’d watched Fight Club, a 1999 trendsetter (Edward Norton is one of my faves), but couldn’t finish. I had to pack it in as my friends intruded the drawing room. Man, whenever I sit to see a movie, I get interrupted. I also didn’t finish watching ”Shutter Island” for the same cause. I don’t know whether I watch these too-meandering-and-difficult-to-understand flicks again, but I’m missing them and want to see them as early as possible. May be because I’m not a serious moviegoer, I found those movies too complex to get hold of. Do they demand repeated viewings (to apprehend wholly)?

प्रिय समुद्र, पत्र पाएर खुशी लाग्यो…


"…….तर

बाबुले जसरी खुला
मनले यी पंक्तिहरू लेख्यौ — समग्र कृतिभरी तपाईं कताकता अभिमानी लाग्नु हुन्छ हुन तपाईंले नै भन्नुभएको , अभिमानबिनाको साहित्यकार हुँदैन मानव स्वभावत:
अभिमानी हुन्छ नै   तर पनि,
विदेशी जागिर, भ्रमण लगायतका अन्य कतिपय कुराहरुमा तपाईं धेरै अहंकारी लाग्नुहुन्छ
तिम्रो
स्पष्टवादिता
मलाई मन पर्‍यो । त्यसले तिम्रो आत्मविश्वास बताउँछ । आत्मविश्वास एक
किसिमको
स्वाभिमान हो । तिमीले जे लेख्यौ र जे संकल्प गर्‍यौ त्यसले म खुशी छु ।

सफल र सार्थक
जीवनको
शुभकामना सहित,


जगदीश घिमिरे
"

Do I
Sound
Assertive?

I had sent Jagdish Ghimire, a renowned writer,
analyst and social worker, an email expressing my opinion
and love for his magnum opus अन्तर्मनको यात्रा after

reading it, some months ago. And, in a rare instance of reply, he wrote
me back those lines.
He’s talked
about my forthrightness. But, I’m amazed, do I really have any sort of
confidence?

He further writes:

"बाबुले भनेको कुरा ठीक हो । ममा साहित्यकमा हुनुपर्ने अभिमान छ
। त्यो कुरा म बोल्छु, लेख्नु मात्रै होइन बाँच्न पनि चाहन्छु । कति सकेको
छु वा छैन, त्यो आफ्नै ठाँउमा छ ।…" 

He
writes:

"…..तर तिमीले भने जस्तो
मलाई विदेशी जागीर र विदेश भ्रमणको अलिकति पनि अभिमान छैन । संयोगवश म ती
परिस्थितिमा पुगेको हुँ र तीबाट मैले सिक्ने अवसर पाँए । त्यस्तो जागीर खाने
र त्यस्तो विदेश पुग्ने धेरै छन् जसको कुनै सामाजिक देन छैन । मलाई
अभिमान छ भने मैले स्वयंसेवाभावले गरेको साहित्य सिर्जना र सामाजिक कार्यमा छ
। मैले विदेशी जागीर छोडेर रामेछापमा गरेको काममा मलाई अभिमान छ । अरू
केहीमा पनि छैन । मलाई कहिल्यै पनि समाज-मारा घमन्डीहरूका अगाडी निहुरिन मन
लागेन तर समाजसेवीलाई केही दिनेहरूका अगाडि सधै
विनम्र हुन मन लाग्यो ।
त्यो मेरो स्वावास्तिकता हो । त्यसलाई कसैले घमन्ड देख्छन् कसैले
स्वाभिमान ।…….." 

Actually, I found his opus inspiring and it’s one of the
best books I’ve ever read. Some last chapters of this book are full of agonizing narration of his struggle against myeloma cancer which nearly made my eyes wet. The award winning memoirs has been
considered  as a great piece of literary work in Nepali literature.

Excerpts from the email I sent  him:  "नमस्ते !
जगदीश अँकल, तपाईंको अमुल्य कृति अन्तर्मनको यात्रा
पढिसकेपछि तपाईंलाई नलेखीकन बस्नै सकिनँ, कम्तिमा तपाईंको स्वास्थ्यको कामनाको लागि पनि मैले अक्षरबाटै सही वन्दना गर्ने निधो गरेको हुँ

जगदीश अँकल, साँच्चै भन्नुपर्दा तपाईंको प्रस्तुत कृति मैले लगभग एक वर्ष अगाडि किनेको थिएँ अझ भनौं, पुस्तक प्रेमी मेरो दाईले मेरै लागि भनेर किन्नुभएको उहाँको अनौठो बानी, उहाँ सबै पुस्तक पढ्नुहुन्न तर पुस्तक संकलनमा असाध्य सौखिन हुनुहुन्छ त्यतिखेर लगभग आधाजति पढेर मैले तपाईंको यो कृति त्यत्तिकै थन्क्याएको थिएँ, खोई किन,
त्यतिखेर त्यो किताब पढेर सिध्याउँछु जस्तै लागेन तर,
कुनैदिन फेरि पढ्नेछु भनेर निश्चय चाहिं गरेको थिएँ लगभग वर्ष दिनपछि
अन्तर्मनको यात्रा
का पानाहरु फेरि पल्टिए,
यसचोटी दृढ थिएँ जाँच आँउदै गरेको भएता पनि मैले पाठ्यक्रमका किताब नछोईकन समय मिलाएर एकै दिनमा शुरुदेखिनै पढेर यो किताब सिध्याएँ ।…."

"…..यो कृतिको मैले के वर्णन गर्नु ! जीवनप्रतिको मेरो गलत दृष्टिकोण अनि बुझाईलाई जरैदेखि हल्लायो,
यस किताबले अनि प्रेरित गर्र्यो,
वास्तविक सार्थक जीवन जियाईको यात्रातर्फ यस अर्थमा अत्यन्त कृतज्ञ छु, यस कृतिप्रति साँच्चै,
हामी कैयौं मानिसहरु रुमल्लिरहेका छौं, आफ्नै कोठे अनि बैठके संसारमा,
एउटा मार्गनिर्देशक विचार अनि प्रेरणाको अभावमा,
अज्ञानमा जीवन,
संसार अनि समस्त जगतप्रतिको तपाईंको भोगाईको सरल अनि सहज व्याख्याले मजस्ता युवाहरुलाई एउटा स्पष्ट मार्गनिर्देशन गरेको

जगदीश अँकल, तपाईंले नेपाल साप्ताहिकमा लेख्न थालेदेखि नै हो,
मैले तपाईंलाई चिनेको त्यतिखेर केही समय नेपालको नियमित पाठक पनि थिएँ तर पछि मैले हिमाल खबरपत्रिका पढ्न थालेको हुँ

यहाँको स्वास्थ्यको सतत् कामना अनि वन्दना गर्नलाई मसँग अरु केही छैन, यी शब्दहरु अनि तपाईंप्रतिको मेरो अन्तर्मनको अगाध सम्मान बाहेक ।…"

I wrote this email by fantasizing
another me: confident, bubbly, energetic and enthusiastic. This self of
me is only imaginary, fantasized. So it really doesn’t mesh with real
me. In real, I’m devastated and I myself long for such confidence and
fondness. But, it’s also true that my such confident and enthusiastic
self is overshadowed by everlasting depressive one that I’m living with.

However,  it was an experience that I can’t forget so easily.

In the age of Twitter, Facebook,
texting and telephoning; emails are gradually getting obsolete. But,
I’ve different story. I do email and there’s only one person I email and
it’s She.

Why I Can’t Sleep

Why I can’t sleep? I get exhausted. I feel listless, clapped out. Can’t sit longer on couch. Eyes turn bleary. I then lie flat on the bed….but….I can’t sleep. Eyes become red but sleep remains elusive. I know, I rarely get enough sleep, needed for an adult. My food behaviour has also changed. Even a strong glass/cup of latte or milk-tea can alone act as my ‘lunch’. I wonder, my family too that when do I get back things normal so I could stop being ”scrawny”. What can I do? I’m just weary of seeking in vain advices, suggestions and solace. Some of my friends even suggested me to ‘seek solace in the bottle’. They’re referring to booze. So, no more of them. Let things go the way they are. I want no developments.

Maoists had no other way but to back off from their stance and reconcile with criminal NC and UML. The worst thing is, Maoists are sort of ‘abusing’ people’s belief (on them). No more lies. They must confess to people that they can’t shun this parliamentary system and that the ‘revolution’ is not possible from them. But, it would be more than a ‘revolution’ if  Prachanda can become Dr. Mahathir Mohammad of Nepal (because it’s sure Maoists will dominate Nepali politics for years to come).

I think, polarization in communist circle is developing on in three different ideologies. UML represents those who by name are communists but actually not. Counter-revolutionary ideas dwell in this group. Maoists have turned revisionists but has revolutionary spirit alive to some extent. And, there’s a true revolutionary thoughts which Matrika Yadav, Mani Thapa etc. are championing.

Comparatively, Maoists represent a large and potent portion. UML is only a few distance away to remove ”communist” from it’s name. So, ultimately, there would be only two main streams: Maoists and the one represented by Matrika Yadav, Mani Thapa etc. Maoists have power but lack revolutionary ideas (esp. after their foray into parliamentary system) whereas Matrika Yadav, Mani Thapa-led factions are highly revolutionary but lack mass support. The friction between these two ultimate principles will dominate the communist movement in years to come.

Exams are going on. I’ve some papers left unfinished from 7th semester, Design of R.C.C. etc. and also some practical ones, too. I’m all but destroyed since the apocalypse but am attending them. Exams were previously postponed for several times.

Dissolve the Boondoggle

Yeah, it’s better to suffer chaos and violence for good than relax in dead peace for bad.

What current Nepalese political scenario suggests? People are being terrorized by the leaders and so called ”analysts” that if the tenure of Constituent Assembly (CA) is not extended, Nepal will witness a suicidal situation it never saw before. I laugh off the suggestion. Sky won’t fall down. There would be no bloodshed (as much of blood is already shed during People’s War). The only force that could lead and mobilize any organised revolt is Maoists. But, Maoists themselves aren’t ready for violence anymore. So, there’s no possibility of such war and bloodshed. Sporadic incidents of violence is another thing and it’s still being carried out in different parts of the kingdom. And, about the ongoing chaotic condition, we’ve been living with this ”eternity” for decades, thanks to our loused up politics.

One thing is clear: Royal Nepalese Army just can’t risk its professional image by taking over the state power (after so called Jestha 14). Moreover, it’s not ”experienced” in such stuffs and I also doubt does it really have stomach for it? Being propped up, as has been talked, just doesn’t make sure it works out. But yeah, army’s ambition might have been heightened as speculation of army takeover has long been discussed. To fuel the ambition further, army is unnecessarily depicted as so called strong, centuries-old and stable institution.

Dissolve CA. It’s of no use. A true people’s constitution cannot be written with this constituent assembly till criminal NC and UML posses seats in it. It would only give legitimacy to criminal NC and UML for longer, if not dissolved now. About Maoists, they always can’t carry it just because it’s their ‘child’. Once seen (and also touted as panacea) as a true future-maker of Nepalis, CA has now fallen into the hands of counter-revolutionaries and regressive criminals and thugs.

I’ve since been opponent of CA when it was decided without the consent of monarchy. Let it fall and go for a ‘people’s revolt’. Is it viable? People’s revolt could have been possible had Maoists not halted their indefinite general strike and mass demonstration. I don’t think any such uprising again is possible in near future. Maoists did a great blunder by deferring the strike. Thing is not about what the world thinks and how it reacts. If people are in support of a revolt for good, Nepal could survive well with pride as another Cuba and NKorea. And, I think Maoists have with them a large number of people and the number is enough to make a revolt happen. But, do they have stomach for the revolt? I barely believe.

Yet, I welcome their decision to not extend the tenure of CA until a national reconciliation is reached.

Now, even if they’re geared up for the revolt (let’s assume), season is not favourable. It’s a beloved time for peasants to work in their field in rainy season. So, for now, such revolt seems to be a thing of far away.

Blames won’t be (and cannot be) targeted at Maoists for the demise of CA because most of the commoners don’t believe it could give them a good constitution, given the political chicanery they’ve been witnessing in the name of CA . Some few capitalist city population could think otherwise but they’re no longer decisive.

Constitution alone is nothing. We want prosperity, not mere leaves of paper. About the need of so called ‘institutionalization’ of peace process, constitution is not an only one means. We already wrote half a dozen of constitutions and they’re just wasted and spoiled. So, keeping CA, a boondoggle, alive and ‘functioning’ is only a squandering of people’s hard-paid taxes and the state coffer. So, without any delay, DISSOLVE IT or let it dissolve itself. Jestha 15 won’t be any different than today, so far I think.

If Jestha 15, by some way, incites strong public reaction, I would only see how the reaction would be addressed. If people take the revolt on for a true change, I would love and happily be a part of them.

Why Cars are Abominable

My father had expressed his interest to invest in a passenger vehicle. He thinks it provides instant profit. I loved his idea and also said a truck is more profitable than passenger one but my bro didn’t. He’s not yet given up his idea and let’s see if he can go with it.

Karl Marx would have forbidden the use of cars? Petrol/diesel-driven road vehicles were not yet invented in his time.

It’s ironic that although cars are not forbidden in communist system, some of the absolute communist states have almost avoided using them, such as in Cuba and N Korea and until some years ago in China, too. Yeah, wide use and popularity of car in many capitalist countries has made it inadvertently a symbol of capitalism and also luxury and thus has become an apparent ‘abomination’ among hardcore communists. It’s costly value might also be a cause of it’s obsolesce among relatively frugal communists.

In a recent picketing of Singh-Durbar by Maoists on 9th May, immediately after the deferment of their general strike, a scuffle between the demonstrators and police personnel broke out near Maitighar Mandala and in a scene, I saw, some protesters were vandalizing cars and SUVs parked along the broad way. Though, such scenes were not new for us, ordinary people’s anger and hatred against cars and other expensive vehicles was yet again evident in that incident. They spared other vehicles and only targeted shiny cars and did damage as much and worse as they can.

In most cases of the vandalism in clashes and scuffles during protests, cars have often been a primary target. Generally, vandals are from poor economic background and customarily, such ‘expensive sights’ stoke up their hatred against the elites, plutocrats and thus they go on vandalizing spree. In Nepal, most of we Nepalis are generally poor and only affluent elites, aristocrats and the nouveau riche can afford automobile. This inequality drives people envious of those car owners and disgruntled paupers then spill their anger at cars.

I still recall that scene I watched on TV: They spared other vehicles and only vandalized cars and SUVs.

They’re (those vandals) not wrong. They represent a true picture of suppression, inequalities and other feudal treatments the ruling establishment has long inflicted upon them.

Economic inequality is one of the root causes of instability and violence. It could anytime incite violence. Why Maoists decades-long People’s War made it’s stronghold among the poor rural population? We all know.

Reviving the Glory

I loved a statement made by Mani Thapa — a communist leader who defected Maoists some years ago, I think around 2063 — as to Maoists in a television talk-show that Prachanda and Baburam can no longer lead the revolution, given their abandonment of People’s War and foray into the parliamentary system and that a new force should take the lead to further the process of revolution. He says, different leaders and parties spearheaded the communist movement in different periods in it’s history of 60 years, and Prachanda and Baburam  with their Maoists party also brought the movement to a new height through People’s War. And, now no more progress is possible from them and a new force should arise to assume the lead from where Maoists had left.

But, what could that ”new force” be? Mani Thapa’s ‘Revolutionary Left Wing’ is still in it’s infancy. Matrika Yadav is a true revolutionary, but he alone can’t get things done.

”UMLisation” of Maoists has left a big dent in the prospect of success of the communist revolution.

Yeah, top Maoists echelons have turned revisionists and reformists. However, despite all their ‘faults’ and shortcomings, we see no prospect of immediate rise of another leftist force that could overtake the Maoists and assume the lead.

Communism was pronounced ‘dead’ by it’s adversaries after the fall of Soviet Union in early 90s. Even the communists themselves seemed to be disappointed about the future of communism.

But, exceptions are always there to dent the whole.

Surprisingly, communist parties — though, they are in decline in other parts of the world — are popular in
Nepal. Existence of dozens of communist parties prove this fact. Far more than two-third
of Nepalis are communists, given the votes communist parties collected in
CA election.

A communist revolution is possible in Nepal, if all
these communist parties unite to forge a single one. But it’s only a
sweet dream because they all are driven so badly by their petty
interests that such unification seems almost impossible.

The recent mass movement was ‘historical’ in many ways, not only by it’s grandeur i.e. the largest gathering ever, nor a show of great discipline and restraint.

The unprecedented show of Hammer and sickle flags spells something that people truly desire.
 
          
 
Kathmandu and other major cities were drenched in red throughout the mass demonstrations, thanks to the beloved red flags of Hammer and sickle, emblem of communism. People didn’t even seem weary of holding the beloved flags aloft all the day in the scorching sun throughout those six days of protest. Why do they love Hammer and sickle so much? The unprecedented show of Hammer and sickle flags invoked the memories I still have left little in my mind that I collected from the stories of Chinese and Cuban revolutions in my preteen and early teen. I first read about the Chinese revolution in 7th grade, I think and it quickly fascinated me. Stories of red Hammer and sickle flags fluttering in every mountain, village, town; Red army marching carrying the flags etc. were enough to excite and influence my adolescent mind.

I know, my family’s long inclination to communist ideas has largely shaped my thoughts.

The unprecedented show of Hammer and sickle flags in the recent mass demonstration has, indeed, revived the glory of past communist revolutions (among Nepalis) and may also have inspired them for a true revolution that’s not yet done.

The Best Prachanda Speech

It’s well known to all that the general strike was called off mostly because of the foreign pressure, not at the will of Maoist leaders. I’ve been critical of top Maoists echelons and this incident has cemented my criticism further. The mass movement was gaining it’s momentum and before it reached it’s climax, it got suddenly halted.

Maoist leaders’ sombre faces during the press conference tells something yet untold.

I don’t think they abused the strength of the largest human gathering ever in Nepal, but also failed to ‘exploit’ it.

However, things have not gotten worse and undone yet. They have already thrust pressure upon the group of criminals (not government, I never call it so) with the demonstration and now with the withdrawal of the strike, they have now supports poured in from all around to ask resignation of MKN. As for the group, it never feels any moral obligation to ease the current deadlock. So, being the largest party, Maoists must spearhead the national politics responsibly. Being the largest party and having enormous popular support, they can’t ‘beg’ with any, they only can ‘give’. It’s only a matter of time. Sooner or later, they will prevail. No one and thing can stifle their chances.

But it’s worse, if the mass demonstration was organised on spec.

Prachanda, Maoists supremo, gave his probably the best speech (also equally emotional) in a mass meeting at Khulamanch on May 8th. He strongly criticized elites and also people from Kathmandu. He’s true in quite a lot of things. Let’s not talk about elites only. Even the ordinary people from there are never in support of any major historical change. When the entire nation was reeling under the worst of violence and unrest during People’s War, Kathmandu was relatively safe, calm and untouched. When people in small towns and villages used to shut their doors and windows, in fear and horror, even before the nightfall; people in Kathmandu were enjoying night life in bars and pubs. For them, Maoists were only a thing to be seen on TV, to be read on newspapers. And, they’re thus weird, horrific and also charismatic (to them).

In CA election, they voted in favour of Maoists only to give them the benefit of the doubt– and also a ”chance”, I think. I don’t think Maoists revolutionary slogans did appeal them.

But, they think despite their relative small population, they hold the key to any major change. They’re true to some extent too. Perpetual centralized state system has been reinforcing the so called ‘supremacy’ of Kathmandu. Yes, they played a major role in the "Jana-Aandolan” of 2046. But, their influence, it seemed, was withering away in later years and in Jana-Aandolan-2 of 2062/63, they almost lost it. If Maoists had not brought hundreds of thousands of people from rural areas into Kathmandu, the movement would have remained limited around Ratna Park with only a handful of people chanting slogans as their daily chore. People in small towns and villages have now proved to be decisive, thanks to the tremendous political awareness and endurance Maoists’ People’s War brought them. 

Ruling elites hear them even if they’re few, whereas hundreds of thousands of rural people’s voice falls in the deaf ears. This is a tragic reality in this feudal system. They disrespected those from rural areas without even shoes and trousers as ‘hicks’ during the now-deferred mass movement. They said they felt ‘imposed’ and ‘invaded’. This sucks. Prachanda mentioned it in his speech, with full of emotion and anger.

I — let’s keep my doubts and ideological differences aside —  for the first time, saw a true face of a communist in Prachanda who dared to speak against the city dweller in favour of rural, downtrodden people: staple base of Maoists.

The ”unsuccessful” mass demonstration by rural people might have reinforced the chauvinism of  residents of Kathmandu.

But, small towns and villages are sprawling with it’s people sharply aware of political things and they’re slowly outdoing the influence of Kathmandu. Not population, ideological excellence can alone subdue the large no of people (by small population).

Anyway, those downtrodden, sidelined and suppressed peasants, workers etc. will someday prove they — only they — are the ultimate force that decides the fate of the country.